Fixing a High Sex Drive – Suggestive Remedies
It is very normal to have a sex drive, but when it is very high, there seems to be a problem. Have you wondered why you have a high sex drive just sometimes? Do you think it is abnormal? Well, just relax, in this amazing article, there are many effective remedies on how you can fix your high sex drive.
A person who has extremely frequent or a suddenly increased sex drive may be experiencing hypersexuality, while the opposite condition is hyposexuality. A person may have a desire for sex, but not have the opportunity to act on that desire, or may on personal, moral, or religious reasons refrain from acting on the urge. A high sex drive potentially becomes a problem when it results in sexual activity that feels out of control, such as sexual compulsion. Sex drive is also known as libido and it is a person’s overall sexual drive or desire for sexual activity. Libido is influenced by biological, psychological, and social factors.
Biologically, the sex hormones and associated neurotransmitters that act upon the nucleus accumbens (primarily testosterone and dopamine, respectively) regulate libido in humans. Social factors, such as work and family, and internal psychological factors, such as personality and stress, can affect libido. Libido can also be affected by medical conditions. Psychologically, a person’s urge can be repressed or sublimated. Conversely, a person can engage in sexual activity without an actual desire for it. Multiple factors affect human sex drive, including irritation, illness, pregnancy, and others.
When is a High Sex drive a problem?
A high sex drive usually isn’t a problem if you do not feel ruled by your sexual urges or thoughts. If you have a high sex drive and are having all the satisfying sex you crave, then you might actually be rather pleased with it!
But you may struggle with your high sex drive if you experience any of the following:
✔ You are not able to achieve satisfaction, no matter how much sex or masturbation you have.
✔ You are not able to get the amount or type of sex you desire.
✔ You are troubled or shamed by persistent fantasies.
✔ You regularly sacrifice work, social, or sleep time for your sexual exploits.
✔ You have sore genitals from excessive sex or masturbation.
✔ You habitually seek out unsatisfactory or risky sexual exploits.
✔ You feel bad that your pursuit of sexual satisfaction prevents you from having a relationship.
How can I fix my high sex drive?
Dealing with an unwanted sex drive can be difficult and lead to uncomfortable feelings and situations. If you’re looking for ways to escape urges at the moment
If you are concerned that you have an overly high sex drive and looking for ways to escape the urges and fix it right, try the following tips:
Talk about it
Whatever the cause, if you are not happy with your sex life, talking therapy can help you offload, explore thoughts, feelings, experiences and desires around sex, love, relationships, and beyond. Establishing what you want from your life in general and then working out realistic ways to get it can help you feel more in control and less at the mercy of your urges.
Interrupt your urges
When I ask sexually compulsive clients if they have ever not acted on a sexual urge – whether it’s masturbating in the office loos or booking an appointment with a sex worker — they often say no. Understanding that sexual urges – much like cravings for cigarettes or cake – do pass if un-fuelled by yearning thoughts or actions, can be a revelation.
If you become aroused and you want to not act on your urges, here are a few things you can do:
✔ Try mental gymnastics, for example, practice your 26 times table.
✔ Focus on something else; search your surroundings for squares or anything blue.
✔ Refer to a list you’ve made about how great your partner is, or what you will gain from not acting out.
✔ The benefits of using a sex toy are numerous including keeping kegel muscles toned and your libido fixed. You could sex toys like a pipedream to spice up your relationship and maintain your sex drive.
Channel your energy
Some people derive great relief, pleasure, and pride from channeling their sexual energy into other things. This could mean doing something creative, physical, thrilling, or spiritual. Popular pursuits include long-distance running, dancing, learning the guitar, abseiling, DIY, cooking, yoga, and Tantra.
Work on finding satisfying sex
High sex drives can be particularly tormenting for those who struggle to find sexual partners. I help such clients explore ways to build confidence, improve how they relate to others (including being open, curious and complimentary without seeming creepy), discover ways to meet possible sexual partners — for example online, on courses, or at Meetup events — and learn ways to have sex with someone they might care about, which usually involves embracing the wonderful realities of non-pornified human nature.
Hook up sites, sex parties or sex professionals can help some people satisfy their urges but they aren’t always sustainable solutions for people with high sex drives. They don’t always guarantee sex – let alone satisfying sex. They may also go against the person’s moral compass, lead to overspending or preclude intimacy.
Work through relationship issues
Some high sex drive people in monogamous relationships frequently beg their partner for sex. This is a very bad form. It’s not sexy and, whether or not they give in, can kill off whatever sexual feelings their partner has for them, as even tender affection is viewed as a hopeful route to sex.
When couples with mismatched libidos come to me, I ask them both what they wish their sex life would look like. Sometimes it’s helpful to schedule times to connect and be intimate. During these times they could choose to do things like go on a date, have a top half only make-out session, be naked without worrying about being aroused (maybe holding each other or having a bath), or having sex.
I’ve heard clients with higher libidos argue that they are allowed to have sex outside the relationship. While open relationships can work, it’s best when it’s seen as an exciting thing that both partners can participate in.
Take something to lower your sexual urges
If your sexual urges are occupying your every waking thought and becoming problematic, there are a few things you can take to decrease your sex drive:
Anaphrodisiacs: Just as aphrodisiacs such as oysters or chocolate are said to enhance the libido, anaphrodisiacs are said to dull it. There are several food ingredients, herbs, and supplements that fall into this category including soy, liquorice, chaste berry, hops, and wild lettuce.
Antidepressants: Selective serotine reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) are the most commonly prescribed antidepressants and can cause the highest frequency of sexual dysfunction, followed by monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs) and then tricyclic antidepressants. Antidepressants can cause decreased sex drive, delayed or absent orgasm, and ejaculatory disturbances. Consequently, these same drugs are commonly prescribed to help men overcome premature ejaculation.
Change your medication: If your medication is causing you to feel more aroused than usual, it may be possible to change your medication or lower the dosage – enough to take the edge of the urges but still to help what whatever it is you are taking it for. Always seek medical advice before changing your medication.
Herbs have long been used to help with physical, mental, and emotional problems. Chaste Tree Berry, also called Monk’s Pepper or Cloister Pepper, historically was used to help monks maintain their celibacy. Some people use licorice to reduce testosterone
Some teas can help with lowering testosterone and sex drive. Spearmint tea and licorice tea are herbal teas that can help reduce testosterone. Find a medicinal-grade tea and brew as indicated.
Watch your fat intake.
Carefully watch your diet and your saturated fat intake. Saturated fat can positively affect libido and testosterone production. Get some blood tests to see where your cholesterol is at, and make some substitutions if need be.
If your sex drive is distracting you and you can’t focus on what you need to do, find a small distraction. Go on a walk, paint, read, or write. Put your attention to something else. Distract your mind or distract your body by focusing on other things.
If your body is tense, get moving. Go to the gym or exercise. Do some yoga or more vigorous exercise such as kickboxing. Moving your body can help you distract it for the moment. However, be mindful that exercise can increase testosterone production, so be careful in how often and how intense your workouts are.
Mindfulness is a way to tune into your own bodily sensations. While you might turn off your mind for meditation, you want to focus it in mindfulness. If you’re focused mostly on your sexual organs, perform a body scan, and attend to each area of your body, from head to toe. Focus on your senses instead of your thoughts or sexual feelings.
- Tune in to one sense at a time. For example, take a moment and really listen. Hear the birds chirp with a deep reflective thought and fully turn your attention to what sounds exist around you.
Use relaxation. Find some healthy outlets for stress, such as relaxation. Handling stress on a regular basis can help you cope with increasing sexual tensions and deal with them daily. Instead of letting tensions mount, practice relaxation for 30 minutes each day to help you deal with buildups of stress and by this seek for sleek satisfying toy objects.
Everybody has their standard libido. If your sex drive drops from that standard, you’re experiencing low libido. If your sex drive increases from that standard, you’re experiencing high libido. An out of control sexuality can also be hard for those around you. You may think you are fine, but your boss, your partner, or your mates might fear that you are spending too much time in the pursuit of sex. Either these people don’t understand you, or you are in denial about your problematic relationship with sex. While increased sexual desire is perfectly normal for young people experiencing hormonal surges, if you are older, a number of other factors can impact your sex drive. Your sexual behavior could be having a negative impact on other areas of your life, such as your health, relationships, work if not properly handled.
Eric Berne, A Layman’s Guide to Psychiatry and Psychoanalysis (1976) p. 69 and 101
Bala, Areeg; Nguyen, Hoang Minh Tue; Hellstrom, Wayne J. G. (2018-01-01). “Post-SSRI Sexual Dysfunction: A Literature Review”. Sexual Medicine Reviews. 6 (1): 29–34
Burrows, Lara J.; Basha, Maureen; Goldstein, Andrew T. (2012-09-01). ‘’The Effects of HormonalContraceptives on Female Sexuality: A Review’’ The Journal of Sexual Medicine.
Reconceiving the second sex Marcia Claire Inhorn – 2009.